Insurance to Win-1

Like success, failure is many things to many people. With Positive Mental Attitude, failure is a learning experience, a rung on the ladder, a plateau at which to get your thoughts in order and prepare to try again.

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10 Deadly Sins of Negative Thinking:

I will be happy once I have ______ (or once I earn X amount)

Problem: If you think you can’t be happy until you reach a certain point, or until your reach certain income, or have a certain type of house or car or office, you will be never happy. The elusive goal is always just out of reach. Once we reach those goals, we are not satisfied – we want more.

Solution: Learn to be happy with what you have, where, and who you are, right at this moment. Happiness doesn't have to be some state that we want to get to eventually – it can be found right now. Learn to count your blessing, and see the positive in your situation. This might sound simplistic, but it works.

I wish I were as____________ as (a celebrity, sportsperson and businessman).

Problem: We’ll never be as  pretty, as talented, as rich, as sculpted, as cool, as everyone else. There will always be someone better, if you look hard enough. Therefore, if we compare ourselves to others like this, we will always pale, and will always fail and will always feel bad about selves.  This is no way to be happy.  

Solution: Stop comparing yourself to others, and look instead at yourself – what are your strengths, your accomplishments, your success, however small? What do you love about yourself? Learn to love who are you are, right jow, not who you want to become. There is good in each of us, love in each of us, and a wonderful human spirit in every one of us.

Seeing other becoming successful make jealous and resentful:

Problem: First, this assumes that only a small member of people can be successful. In truth, many, many people can be successful – in different ways.

Solution: Learn to admire the success of others, and learn from it, and be happy for them, by empathizing with them and understand what it must be like to be them. And then turn away from them, and look at yourself – you can be successful too, in whatever you choose to do. And even more, you already are successful. Look not at those above you in the social ladder, but those below you – there are always millions of people worse off then you, people who could not read this article or afford a computer, in the that light you are a huge success.

PHD-IN-COUNSELING-EDUCATION 

I am miserable failure – I can’t seem to do anything right:

Problem: Everyone is a failure, if you look at it in certain ways.  Everyone has failed, many times, at different things. I have certainly failed so many times I cannot count them – and I continue to fail, daily. However, looking at your failures as failures only makes you feed bad about yourself. By thinking in this way, we will have a negative self-image and never move on from them.

Solution: See your successes and ignore your failure. Look back on your life, in the last month, or year, or 5 years. And try to remember your success. If you have trouble with this, start documenting them – keep a success journal, either in a notebook or online. Document your success  each day, or each week. When you look back at what you've accomplished, over a year, you will be amazed. It is an incredibly positive feeling.

I’m going to beat so-and-so no matter what – I’m better than him. And there’s no way I’ll help him succeed. – he might beat me.

Problem: Competitiveness assumes that there is a small amount of gold to be had, and I need to get it before he does. It makes us into greedy, back-stabbing, hurtful people. We try to claw our way over people to get to success, because of our competitive feeling. For example, if blogger wants to have more subscriber than another blogger, he may never link to or mention that other blogger. However, who is to say that my subscriber can’t also be yours? People can read and subscribe to more than one blog.

Solution: Learn to see success as something that can be shared, and learn that if we help each other out, we can each have a better chance to be successful. Two people working towards a common goal are better than two people trying to beat each other up to get to that goal. There is abundance rather than scarcity.

There are five more to come in the next blog. I am not saying following this is an insurance to success. But definitely saying not following this step towards failure. 
Read the part-2 also: